Usually I don’t like talking or writing about my feelings when I’m very happy. There’s this fear in me that I’ll jinx myself and end up in misery again. But why should we only talk about the bad stuff? I want to smile in the places I once cried so here’s to me smiling.
3 weeks ago I felt like I was between a rock and a hard place. I wanted to make the best decisions but I wasn’t sure if I had the guts for all that glory. I’m being vague but I don’t want this post to be long. I’ll probably try to write individual posts for the different situations (fingers crossed). Anyways I chose to have guts, faith in God and trust my intuition for all the situations I was facing at that time.
Fast forward to now and I’m feeling pretty good about my choices. There’s no guarantee that everything will continue to be how it is but I know I have no regrets. I’m a firm believer in divine timing and everything happening for a reason. I just want to live in the moment, savour the good times and smile.
The Easter weekend was one that made me smile the most. I took a self-care day on Friday, my girlfriend made the cutest little selfcare list for me. I had a little girls night out with my bestfriend. We went to a restaurant by the dock and drank a bit. My guy bestfriend came over on Easter Sunday and we drank wine then vibe to Drake. We love to talk about our feelings with Drake blasting. My girlfriend and I hopped on a video call and she made me laugh a whole lot on Easter Monday. I felt truly happy and the feeling just hasn’t left.
The simple things in life should be treasured
Girl In Her Twenties
God has been good to me and I don’t let it go unnoticed. I thank him every opportunity I get. He has constantly shown me that I need to be hopeful through the storm because he has better days ahead for me.
I wanna change the narrative, lets talk about happy things. It’s Saturday night, what’s making you happy this week? Let me know in the comments.
When did I write I Need to Read More? A month ago, maybe two. After posting that blog I decided to reach out to an author that I’ve been following on Instagram for a hot minute. I told her I’d love to review her books and she was kind enough to refer me to her publicist who sent the books within a week.
If you’ve been reading my blog then you know This Close To Okay has been on my reading list for a longggggg time. When I finally got it, I just sat and admired the book for a hot minute. Honestly, it is truly one of the best hardcover books I’ve seen. The book jacket is BEAUTIFUL, I think it’s the orange vibe that has me captivated. It lights up my room and I can’t help but stare at it from time to time. Add dye my hair bright orange to my list of things to do.
The extraordinary and probably the revolutionary were spaces my thoughts always occupied for as long as I’ve known myself. I admired the work and leadership of people like Nelson Mandela and wanted to be just like him. I have a very unique name and felt I had to do unique things to live up to it.
I never wanted to succumb to the mundane or just be ordinary. I feared such an existence and thought it would be the worst thing to ever happen to me but woe how the times have changed.
People of the internet, I desire a simple life. Yes, you’ve read correctly. I DESIRE A SIMPLE LIFE.
Can you believe that? It took me a while to swallow that pill but when I did, I wonder why it took so long in the first place. After age 20 or 21, I think I started experiencing more. More lessons gave me more knowledge. All that knowledge made me more self-aware and gave me food for thought as I tried to decipher life and my purpose. I soon started to recognize the things that made me really happy and the things that actually mattered to me.
I’m okay with having a career that brings me small joys, provides good financial support, makes me happy to spend 8 hours there and helps others in some way. I’m okay with a life that includes my own house, a car to take late night drives while listening to my faves. A life with a romantic relationship that reminds me unconditional love exist and both of us are deserving of it. A life filled with amazing lifelong friends paving their own way, friendship dates and vacations in places we once thought impossible. A life where my family is healthy, happy and high on togetherness.
A life where I’m finding more of myself and trusting God. I’m loving, kinder and healing towards myself. Letting generational hurt go and welcoming all the things I deserve. Sharing my many thoughts on a personal blog. A life where I’m donating my time, efforts, money to making even the smallest of difference like baking a cake for a fundraiser towards a worthy cause.
I’m okay with a simple life. The mundane doesn’t scare me anymore. I still admire the persons doing the big stuff but I understand now that everyone has their role to play. Whether it is big or small, it’s crucial to existence and life as we know it.
I feel like I’ve said this before but I’ll say it again. I’m not apprehensive to change but I’m not exactly welcoming to it either. Sometimes I struggle to adjust and I know I’m not the only person who’s like that. There’s a reason why it’s called the comfort zone . . . it’s comfortable.
Okay so great is an exaggeration. I’m doing good, feeling better. More myself honestly. I’m more present and less in my mind which is a blessing for me. It all feels good like inhaling fresh air from an open space.
I haven’t been feeling my best over the last couple of days and it was this feeling of less than good that led me to taking a mini break from blogging. It’s hard to write when I’m having really bad mental days, my mind is just blank and inspiration is severely lacking in those moments.
Yesterday I woke up feeling stuck in my head and indifferent. Sundays usually brought me peace and has always been my favourite day but yesterday morning it wasn’t like that for me. I just wanted to wrap myself up in the blanket on my bed and stay hidden in my room.
After listening to Lewis Capaldi Before You Go today, I cried . . . the loud, tears streaming down my face and praying to God type of crying. Don’t be alarm, I’m doing okay-ish I just had a moment where I needed to release the unreleased. If crying was an extracurricular activity, it would be one I participate in frequently. I love a good cry.
By interviews I mean picking the brains of some of my favourite bloggers and even new ones. I’ve been wanting to do this since around August 2021 but I wasn’t sure until now. Being a personal blogger and reading other bloggers’ posts has intrigued me. For some reason, I’ve always had a whole bunch of questions that I’ve been itching to ask them.
I’m finally more seasoned and less nervous with interacting with other bloggers, so I thought yaaaaaaaaay I can finally start doing the weekly interviews I’ve been dying to introduce to my blog.
Before I could manage my emotions, I had to accept my emotions. Before acceptance, I had to identify my emotions. Before identifying, I had to acknowledge my emotions. Before acknowledgment, I had to be honest with myself. And this took work
You know what scares me more than having difficult conversations with others? Yes, you guessed it having difficult conversations with myself. My mind can be my best friend or worst enemy (it all depends on the day) but the more I’ve allowed myself to process my feelings and thoughts and be honest with myself, the more I realize the difficult conversations are necessary!